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A Book of Burlesques 84The Clergyman

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Literature · Humor

A Book of Burlesques 84

The Clergyman

MenckenEnglish
(The reading finished) Very good. Very creditable. You must see some good oculist about your astigmatism, my dear. Surely you want to avoid glasses. Come to my study on your return and I'll give you the name of a trustworthy man. And now let us proceed with the ceremony of marriage. (To THE BRIDEGROOM): John, wilt thou have this woman to be thy wedded wife, to live together in the holy state of eugenic matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, protect her from all protozoa and bacteria, and keep her in good health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee unto her only, so long as ye both shall live? If so, hold out your tongue.
(THE BRIDEGROOM holds out his tongue and THE CLERGYMAN inspects it critically.)

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A Book of Burlesques 83A Book of Burlesques 85
Sources & credits: Mencken

Mencken — A Book of Burlesques (H. L. Mencken) (author lived 1880–1956). Public Domain. H. L. Mencken, A Book of Burlesques; public domain in the US; text from Project Gutenberg #22145. Source

Literature · Humor

A Book of Burlesques 85

MenckenEnglish